Funny Jokes,Clean Jokes,Funny Pictures,Love story, Nice Quotes and total entertainment
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Best story of the year -2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
How to be a friend...nice article...must read
02. Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.
03. If you can buy a person's friendship, it is not worth it.
04. True friends have hearts that beat as one.
05. If you cannot think of any nice things to say about your friends, then you have the wrong friends.
06. Make friends before you need them.
07. If you were another person, would you like to be a friend of yours?
08. A good friend is one who neither looks down on you nor keeps up with you.
09. Be friendly with the folks you know… if it weren't for them you would be a total stranger.
10. A friend is never known till he is needed.
11. Friendship is a responsibility. ..not an opportunity.
12. Friendship is the cement that holds the world together.
13. Friends are those who speak to you after others don't.
14. The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail and not his tongue.
15. Pick your friends, but not to pieces.
16. A friend is one who puts his finger on a fault without rubbing it in.
17. The way to have friends is to be willing to lose some arguments.
18. If a friend makes a mistake, don't rub it in... Rub it out.
19. Deal with other's faults as gently as if they were your own.
20. People are judged by the company they keep and the company they keep away from.
21. A friend is a person who can step on your toes without messing up your shine.
22. The best mirror is an old friend.
23. The best possession one may have is a true friend.
24. Make friendship a habit and you will always have friends.
25. You will never have a friend if you must have one without faults.
26. Doing nothing for your friends results in having no friends to do for.
27. Anyone can give advice, but a real friend will lend a helping hand.
28. You can make more friends by being interested in them than trying to have them be interested in you.
29. A real friend is a person who, when you've made a fool of yourself, lets you forget it.
30. A friend is a person who listens attentively while you say nothing.
31. You can buy friendship with friendship, but never with dollars.
32. True friends are like diamonds, precious but rare; false friends are like autumn leaves, found everywhere.
33. A friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg even though you're slightly cracked.
Always think positive...nice story
Read this. It is a 100% challenge that u will have a wrong answer to thequestion asked in the passage.
Once there was loving couple travelling in a bus in a mountainous area.They decided to get down at some place. After the couple got down atsome place the bus moved on. As the bus moved on, a huge rock fell onthe bus from the mountain and crushed the bus to crumbs. Everybody onboard was killed.
The couple upon seeing that, said, "We wish we were on that bus" Why do you think they said that?
.
.
Scroll down for answer
Come on think again ......
Come on try hard.....
Come on try hard.......
Come on try hard.......
Come on try hard.......
------------------------------ Answer !!!! --------------------------
If they had remained on the bus instead of deciding to get down, theresulting time delay could have been avoided and the rock would havefallen after the bus had passed ...!!!
Think positive in life always and look for opportunities when u can help Others.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Kids View of Marriage and Relationships
-------------------------------
"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming."
Alan, age 10
"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with."
Kirsten, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
-------------------------------------
"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then."
Camille, age 10
"No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married."
Freddie, age 6
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
--------------------------------------------------
"Married people usually look happy to talk to other people."
Eddie, 6
"You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids."
Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
--------------------------------------------------
"Both don't want no more kids."
Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
----------------------------------
"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
Lynnette, age 8.
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date."
Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
--------------------------------------------------------
"I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns."
Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OK TO KISS SOMEONE?
-------------------------------
"When they're rich."
Pam, age 7
"The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that."
Curt, age 7
"The rule goes like this: if you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do."
Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
--------------------------------------
"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them."
Anita, 9
"Single is better, for the simple reason that I wouldn't want to change no diapers. Of course, if I did get married, I'd just phone my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper-changing."
Kirsten, age 10
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
--------------------------------------------------------------
"There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?"
Kelvin, age 8
"You can be sure of one thing - the boys would come chasing after us just the same as they do now."
Roberta, age 7
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
-----------------------------------
"Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck."
Ricky, age 10
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Things tat matters in 1's lyf,,,!!!
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
'Now ' , said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.'
'The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.'
'The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.'
'The sand is everything else--the small stuff.'
'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.'
'The same goes for life.'
'If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.'
'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.'
'Play with your children.'
'Take time to get medical checkups.'
'Take your partner out to dinner.'
'Play another 18.'
'There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.'
'Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.'
'Set your priorities.'
'The rest is just sand.'
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked.'
'It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a cup of coffee with a friend.'
Please share this with someone you care about.
I JUST DID.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
IF U LUV SUMONE ...EXPRESS IT
As I sat there in English class,
I stared at the girl next to me.
She was my so called 'best friend'.
I stared at her long, silky hair,
and wished she was mine.
But she didn't notice me like that,
and I knew it.
After class,
she walked up to me and asked me for
the notes she had missed the day before.
I handed them to her.She said 'thanks'
and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
I want to tell her, I want her to know
that I don't want to be just friends,
I love her but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
11th grade:-
The phone rang. On the other end,
it was her. She was in tears,;
mumbling on and on about how
her love had broke her heart.
She asked me to come over
because she didn't want to be alone, So I did.
As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her
soft eyes, wishing she was mine.
After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie,
and three bags of chips,
she decided to go home.
She looked at me, said 'thanks'
and gave me a kiss
on the cheek..I want to tell her,
I want her to know that
I don't want to be just friends,
I love her but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
Senior year:-
One fine day she walked to my locker.
'My date is sick' she said,
'hes not gonna go' well,
I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade,
we made a promise that
if neither of us had dates,
we would go together just as 'best friends'.
So we did.
That night, after everything was over,
I was standing at her front door step.
I stared at her as She smiled at me
and stared at me with her crystal eyes.
Then she said- 'I had the best time, thanks!'
and gave me a kiss on the cheek.;
I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don't want to be just friends,
I love her but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
Graduation:-
A day passed, then a week, then a month.
Before I could blink, it was graduation day.
I watched as her perfect body
floated like an angel
up on stage to get her diploma.
I wanted her to be mine-but
she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it.
Before everyone went home,
she came to me in her smock and hat,
and cried as I hugged her.
Then she lifted her head from my shoulder
and said- 'you're my best friend,
thanks' and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don't want to be just friends,
I love her but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
Marriage:-
Now I sit in the pews of the church.
That girl is getting married now.
and drive off to her new life,
married to another man.
I wanted her to be mine,
but she didn't see me like that,
and I knew it.
But before she drove away,
she came to me and said 'you came !'.
She said 'thanks' and kissed me on the cheek.
I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don't want to be just friends,
I love her but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
Death:-
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin
of a girl who used to be my 'best friend'.
At the service, they read a diary entry
she had wrote in her high school years.
This is what it read:
'I stare at him wishing he was mine,
but he doesn't notice me like that,
and I know it.
I want to tell him,
I want him to know that
I don't want to be just friends,
I love him but I'm just too shy,
and I don't know why.
I wish he would tell me he loved me !
.........'I wish I did too...'
I thought to my self, and I cried.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
BEING TWENTY-SOMETHING...Nice Feelings
Thursday, October 21, 2010
3 stupid stages of life
We have 3 stupid stages of life………..
Teen age:
Have Time + Energy …but No Money
Working Age:
Have Money + Energy …but No Time
Old age:
Have Time + Money …but no Energy
Tales from the Panchatantra, Version 2003
Once upon a time, there was a software engineer who used to develop
programs on his Pentium machine, sitting under a tree on the banks of a
river. He used to earn his bread by selling those programs in the Sunday
market.
One day, while he was working, his machine tumbled off the table
and fell in the river. Encouraged by the Panchatantra story of his
childhood (the woodcutter and the axe), he started praying to the River
Goddess.
The River Goddess wanted to test him and so appeared only after
one month of rigorous prayers. The engineer told her that he had lost his
computer in the river.
As usual, the Goddess wanted to test his honesty.
She showed him a match box and asked, "Is this your computer ?"
Disappointed by the Goddess' lack of computer awareness, the engineer
replied, "No."
She next showed him a pocket-sized calculator and asked if
that was his. Annoyed, the engineer said "No, not at all!!"
Finally, she came up with his own Pentium machine and asked if it was his.
The
engineer, left with no option, sighed and said "Yes."
The River Goddess was happy with his honesty. She was about to give him all
three items,
but before she could make the offer, the engineer asked her, "Don't you
know
that you're supposed to show me some better computers before bringing up
my own,like the older Pachatantra Story ?"
The River Goddess, angered at this, replied, "I know that, you
stupid donkey! The first two things I showed you were the Trillennium and
the Billennium, the latest computers from IBM!". So saying, she
disappeared with the Pentium!!
* * * * * * * * *
Moral: If you're not up-to-date with technology trends, it's better keep
your mouth shut and let people think you're a fool than to open your mouth
and remove all doubt.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
What is smartness??Must Read..
The mathematician called his son and asked, "What is more valuable - gold or silver?" "Gold," said the son. "That is correct. Why is it then that the village headman makes fun of you, claims you do not know the value of gold or silver? He teases me every day. He mocks me before other village elders as a father who neglects his son. This hurts me. I feel everyone in the village is laughing behind my back because you do not know what is more valuable, gold or silver. Explain this to me, son."
So the son of the mathematician told his father the reason why the village headman carried this impression. "Every day on my way to school, the village headman calls me to his house. There, in front of all village elders, he holds out a silver coin in one hand and a gold coin in other. He asks me to pick up the more valuable coin. I pick the silver coin. He laughs, the elders jeer, everyone makes fun of me. And then I go to school. This happens every day. That is why they tell you I do not know the value of gold or silver."
The father was confused. His son knew the value of gold and silver, and yet when asked to choose between a gold coin and silver coin always picked the silver coin. "Why don't you pick up the gold coin?" he asked. In response, the son took the father to his room and showed him a box. In the box were at least a hundred silver coins. Turning to his father, the mathematician' s son said, "The day I pick up the gold coin the game will stop. They will stop having fun and I will stop making money."
The bottom line is...
Monday, October 18, 2010
Old lady with Gun..really funny story
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs,
"I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!"
The four men didn't wait for a second threat. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee, and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake. The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing.
He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun. No charges were filed.
Moral of the story? If you're going to have a senior moment...make it memorable.
U' will love this story :)
An old man lived alone in Minnesota . He wanted to spade his potato garden,but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation:
Dear Son,
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother always loved planting time. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over.I know you would dig the plot for me, if you weren't in prison. Love, Dad
Shortly, the old man received this telegram: For Heaven's sake, Dad,don't dig up the garden!! That's where I buried the GUNS!!
At 4a.m. the next morning, a dozen police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any guns. Confused,the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asked him what to do next.
His son's reply was: "Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad.. It's the best I could do for you from here."
Moral:
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN THE WORLD, IF YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING DEEP FROM YOUR HEART YOU CAN DO IT. IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE THOUGHT THAT MATTERS...
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Insight into Decision Making - Good One:..worthy reading
An excellent mail and truth of Life
Insight into Decision Making - Good One:
A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track.
The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange. You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way?
Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make........ .........
and then scroll down for the details.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess. Exactly, to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place?
Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was. This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.
The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens.. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.
While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.
'Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right.'
Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils.
I wonder .... Nice Poem
Friday, October 15, 2010
Cute Love Story
HE LIKED A GIRL WORKING IN A CD SHOP VERY MUCH.
BUT HE DID NOT TOLD HER ABOUT HIS LUV.
EVERYDAY HE WENT TO THE CD SHOP AND BOUGHT A CD ONLY TO TALK TO HER.
AFTER A MONTH HE DIED.
WHEN THE GIRL WENT HIS HOME AND ASKED ABOUT HIM, HIS MOM TOLD THAT HE DIED AND TOOK HER TO HIS ROOM.....................................
SHE SAW ALL THE CD'S UNOPENED ...............
THE GIRL CRIED N CRIED N FINALLY DIED.
YOU KNOW Y SHE CRIED?
ÇOZ SHE HAD KEPT HER OWN LUV LETTERS INSIDE THE CD PACKS.SHE ALSO LUVED HIM.............
moral of the story:
if u love someone......say to him directly don't wait for the destiny to play the role.............otherwise u will lose that person....
Thursday, October 14, 2010
This is what we call coincidence
A computer error gave two women in America called Patricia the same social security number. When the two women were brought together in an office to rectify the blunder they discovered that
They had both been born with the names Patricia Ann Campbell
Both of their fathers were called Robert Campbell
Their birthdays were on 13th March 1941
They had both married military men in the year 1959 (within eleven days of each other)
They each had two children aged 19 and 21
They both had an interest in oil painting
Both had studied cosmetics
Both had worked as book-keepers
I am gonna post some more examples of coincidence in next posts.If you have this type of example, just post in comment :)
Great story :) worthy reading
The Frogs
A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs.
The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man where he could get so many frog legs!
The farmer replied, 'There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs -millions of them.
They all croak all night long and they are about to make me crazy!' So the restaurant owner and the farmer made an agreement that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a time for the next several weeks.
The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather sheepish, with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner
said, 'Well... where are all the frogs?' The farmer said, 'I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise!'
[ Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember, it's probably just a couple of noisy frogs.
Also remember that problems always seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost
overwhelming like a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning comes, and you take a closer look, you'll
wonder what all the fuss was about.]
********************************************************************************************
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
The Turtles :) Great lesson for life
For about six months they cleaned the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements.
Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed.
After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and
wobbled in his shell.
He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned. The family consented and the little turtle left.
Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years...six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich.
At that point the little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, 'See! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt.'
Moral: Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we
do not do anything ourselves.
